69 Tales Of Middle Earth

Infernal Legions of Mordor · 2018 · EP

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Tracklist

  1. The Electricty in the Air Before a Good Siege
  2. Larping at the Blind Guardian Concert
  3. Orc Blade Plunged Deep Into Elven Flesh
  4. Gollum Was a Crack Baby
  5. Witch That Lives in the Trees
  6. The Water Temple Can Suck My Ass
  7. Crowdfunding to Buy Myself Chainmail
  8. Drawn and Quartered Varg Finally Dies
  9. Going for a Hike and Finding a Black Metal Promo Shoot
  10. Cursed Dagger of the Lee‐Hon‐Tuc
  11. My Blade, My Honor, My Suffrage
  12. Thine Torch Igniting Ceremonial Fireworks
  13. M’Lord Is Midieval for Daddy
  14. I Got Roasted by a Guy Wearing a Fedora at a Ren Fair
  15. Masturbaiting to the Elves in Skyrim
  16. Small Sword, Smaller Dick
  17. Lack of Basic Hygiene Doesn’t Make You a Viking
  18. Stabbing the Winner of Varg’s Tabletop R.P.G.
  19. Calling Your Mother’s Basement Your Dungeon
  20. Sexual Fantasy Involving an Orc and a Dwarf
  21. Frolicking Naked in the Trees Because You’re a Wizard
  22. Mark McCoy Before He Was Hipster Black Metal Semen
  23. Ishan Before He Thought He Was in Dream Theater
  24. Mayhem: A Career Made on Two Corpses
  25. Big Sword, Microscopic Penis
  26. That Feel When Good Siege
  27. I Liked Harry Potter Better When He Was in Troll
  28. Using Black Magic to Get Myself a Date
  29. Leading the Charge
  30. Into the Mines of Morea
  31. I Live in a Hut in the Woods With Ildjarn
  32. I Can’t Wait for the Lords of Noisecore to Put a Hit Out on Me
  33. Using Flash During a Black Metal Show to Ruin the Ambience
  34. Wolves in the Throne Room Are a Bunch of Fucking Nerds
  35. I’m From Texas I Don’t Know What Winter Is
  36. You Smell Like an Mmo Player
  37. It’s Not Caps Lock, It’s Kvlt Lock, Dipshit
  38. I Was Born in the Wrong Time, I Want to Lead a Crusade
  39. Leading a Midieval Campain to 711 for Mountain Dew
  40. Beating Up Nerds Outside of the Kamelot Concert
  41. Dungeon Synth: Trve Incel Music
  42. Graveland’s Instagram Sharing Star Wars Memes
  43. Rob Darken Looks Like My Grandma
  44. Getting Lyrical Themes From Runescape
  45. Ildjarn Is a School Teacher
  46. Mortiis Looks Like a Digimon
  47. Cave Dwelling Dungeon Synth Fan
  48. The Trees Tell Me Many Things, Like Where to Score Pcp
  49. This Rock in the Forest Looks Like a Member of a Boston Punk Band
  50. Chainmail Protects Me From Blades but Not Your Insults
  51. Bringing a Sword to a Punk Show to Scare Poseurs
  52. Dear Knight, I Must Commend Your Skullet
  53. Eating From Ye Olde Pizza Cart
  54. Forgotten Forest Path, Leading to a Meth Lab
  55. Spell Book Containing a Couple of Spells
  56. Satan Is M’Lord
  57. Hanging Out With My Fellow Incels at the Iced Earth Concert
  58. Christopher Lee’s Power Metal Band
  59. Drunkenly Slogging Around Demanding People Drink Your Potion
  60. My Dear, Sweet, Combat Alchemist

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